24″ x 36″ Poster
Sample text from Ninja’s Guide for Healthy Living.
• Exercise is important, but jogging is for wimps.
Plenty of exercise can be had leaping from bushes
and kicking joggers in the head.
• Laughter is medicine. Ninjas practice the art of inappropriate laughter. Laughing when hearing about cancer also shows the Ninja’s strength.
• Ninjas occasionally, without warning, stab friends with throwing stars. Life is random. Ninjas embrace this fact of life.
• Killing the wrong person happens. Ninjas know this. It’s useless to live in the past.
• Fiber in your diet is important. Ninjas eat the shirt off of a complete stranger’s back at least once a week.
• Sex is extremely important to one’s physical and mental health.
Ninjas therefore fantasize about sex two, three, maybe seven times a day.
• Everyone knows yoga classes are filled with women.
Ninjas prove their strength and impress the ladies by killing the yoga instructor.
• Samurais are the source of much stress for Ninjas. They think they’re soooooo cool with their armor and swords and those awesome helmets. It’s in a Ninja’s best interest not to think about such things.
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